Its been raining continuously since last night….thunderstorms and lightening…the dark, dangerously overcast skies mirroring the somber brooding within…
Its strangely comforting though…as if someone up there knows…and understands…the whole cosmos standing in solidarity in anguish…
Hv always found something deeply comforting and peaceful about nature…probably becoz hv grown up around it…shared a million secrets with it over the years…the silent symphony of rain on tree tops help to calm the constant cacophony within…to rise above the petty grumbles and whimpers of everyday living and look at life, the world and everything in between from a detached, philosophical viewpoint… the expansive horizons of the sea probably generate capacious thought patterns within….
Standing by the windowsill, bathed in the diffused half-light of a cloudy morning, I brood over the state of constant anticipation I’ve been in for quite some time now….the pregnant promises of the future….the unborn dreams of the past…the need to belong becoming almost more powerful than the need to eat…or sleep…
But the world is a hard place; it has evolved on Darwinian principles; it does not help to be wooly headed about it…there is just no place for sentimentality…except perhaps in your private dreams…
Life is strange…but the stranger it gets, the more predictable it becomes in terms of unpredictability.. and then you wonder who is in control? You? Or life? Are my decisions right? Are they even mine? As for the ‘rightness’ of them, who is to say whose pain is greater…yours or mine?
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The tired rain kept pouring throughout the day…relentless and chilly…..went out on the terrace in the fading twilight….got drenched….stood soaking beneath the purple skies….empty and cold….strains of the Azaan from the mosque come drifting in my ears……Allah…ho Akbar….a litany from my heart….beseeching the heavens above….the last wisp of light fades away…the street lamps light up…one…by one…by one…and a temple bell starts ringing somewhere…
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